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Saturday, November 05, 2005

Hm.. got few more days to go abstinence! Its kinda great experience which I have go through. Honestly as I go through abstinence, it triggers me about people who do not have food to eat, the fear of not getting money to buy food for the day and etc.
Everytime I break my fast, in my prayer that strike my mind is those poor people who have not eaten and yet I have a good food right in front of my eyes once I break fast.
Imagine the fearfullness of their everyday life. If I were born to be in their shoes, what will I do to fullfil my desire of these hunger??Steal?Cry?Beg?Murder?
Abstinence, is just a small action of holding back the desire, it might feel like a torture.. But again looking at those poor people, these is nothing compare to the VERY HARD HARDSHIP that they go through in their everyday life. It really motivate me, there are much much more thing that is worse than what I go through now. What I go through now is the process of preparation to get me prepare of the coming life journey.
But I hope one thing I hope that poor people believe too, life is like a wheel, sometimes you will be on top, sometimes on the bottom. They wont be forever suffering! I know God have a plan for everyone. Just enjoy every moments! Because time cannot be turn back!

Well, this blogging kinda useful for me. Everyday in fact, there are so many things to tell and share. Today was quite a day for me to learn more about the hill tribe people! Its really cooL! I am looking forward for these trip to happen! And I am proud to be part of Marquee Troupe! I go to the museum and took this picture! Yay. Turn out cool! haha..

This day I do a lot gossip!! Hm.. though I feel rather guilty about these, but it almost impossible to go anywhere without gossiping as the topic of conversation, especially girls! That makes me sometimes detest to interact with gals. Geez.. For me everyone have gud and bad point that you will discover only after u get to know them for sometimes. Nothing much u can change a person, but it is more on how you can change yourself to fit to tat person.

Another things about today camp, I know most of my friends who are going for the trips are couples. Somehow, I feel it is rather difficult to mix around with them because of the partner that watching you. I know how girl will be very sensitive looking at the bf who playing or being kind to other girls. This makes me very difficult to communicate, asking help, or whatever I wanted to do towards the guy seems wrong. The invisible barrier is somehow exist.
I hope if I got a bf, I will be sensitive towards my friends as well. This uncomfortableness draw me further away to hold friendship we had.

A big scar that I have, had thought me alot of lesson in my life. It somehow open my eyes in many areas. I hope, I have become a better person..........

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